Clueless Clarence

Zoe Hunter

Clueless Clarence

Clueless Clarence

It is 2008 and Clarence Upton-Smyth, the middle child between two sisters, is fifteen going on sixteen. He has ginger hair, wears glasses and was diagnosed with mild autism when he was three. He knows a lot about music, maths, loves anything to do with the paranormal and, his latest interest, poetry. He is fixated on time so he can’t stand it if other people or things make him late for anything. He also hates waste, untidiness, being disorganised and small, confined spaces.

Clarence only has a few close friends who appreciate the fact – mostly – that he always tells the truth when asked for his opinions. Clarence has a few confrontations with the school bullies and his neighbour. Also, there are a few embarrassing incidents – notably at a certain hundredth birthday party, a football match, a funeral and a wedding.

Clarence has always wanted a girlfriend; is this his year for love? And why is 5th April 2007 such a significant date?

About me

Zoe Hunter was born in 1960s and was raised in Northamptonshire and now lives in Buckinghamshire. She has participated in been in two operatic societies performing in shows from ‘The Merry Widow’ to ‘Pirates of Penzance’. She has had various jobs from teaching children tennis to working with the handicapped. In her spare time she likes to read novels, plays the piano and sings in a choir. Zoe is married with two children.

Leslie Roberts

Leslie was born in North London in the 1920s and attended the well respected Tottenham County School, leaving just before the outbreak of World War 2. In the 1950s he was married with three sons and set about seeking employment which would enable him to pursue his passion for writing. After his wife died, he branched out into the previously unconsidered field of lyric writing, which soon led to the welcome collaboration with Zoe Hunter whose outline above takes up the story of their subsequent development.

Leslie Roberts & Zoe Hunter

Clueless Clarence is dedicated to my family and to the memory of Leslie Roberts. His encouragement, support and friendship were instrumental in turning dreams into reality.

He was a true friend and an inspiration collaborator. I will always treasure my memories of him.

With love

Zoe X

Happy customers

"A very entertaining book and a great insight into the Autistic mind. It's a book full of interesting and lesser known facts too, as well as lots of very witty and chuckle inducing short poems. Well worth a read. 5 stars!"


"Brilliant book, loved it bought one for my mum and friend and they are both enjoying reading the book. Once you start reading you can't book the book down. Check the boy out on youtube - hillarious!"


Clueless Clarence

Clarence has a few confrontations with the school bullies, his neighbour and also there are a few embarrassing incidences especially at a one hundredth birthday party, football match, funeral and a wedding. Clarence has always wanted a girlfriend, is this his year for love? And why is 5th April 2007 such a significant date?

This is his story.

Sunday 27th January

All was quiet and then, out the corner of my eye, I had the fright of my life,…

Sunday 30th June

“..I’m looking at this fantastic brilliantly lit, UFO…What! It’s doubled in size…”

Saturday 6th September

“What do you think you’re doing, get out of our way, stupid woman,” and ”Aaah!”

Tuesday 30th September

“Matt is looking for you….I’ve just seen him and he’s isn’t very happy. So if…”